To Punish and Enslave
by Koplak from the Equator
Summary: Barricade is a police car. He hates every single thing about being a police. Except...He likes the chasing though. Since he can do what he's born to do... A one-shot of brother Barricade :D


**This is actually a oneshot for a oneshot challenge in Quizilla. But since I need to add more TF fanfic, I decided to put him here too. :D**

* * *

The Bank.

Uh-huh. No matter where you are, whatever country, state, province or city, the bank is always the number one place to have a night visit. Probably because many people need money and waiting till it's opened is just a ridiculous idea. Ridiculous, it is. And Barricade hates it.

* * *

Those buzzing again. It caused his circuits to cause a minor glitch. Minor, but tremendously disturbing. With a grunt, Barricade roused from his recharge state. The police frequency said something about a street…a situation…a robbery. If he had human eyes, Barricade would have been rolling them exasperatedly. Seriously, these humans just never knew when to give a disguising Cybertronian robot a proper rest. Although Barricade owned no human driver (and he would never want one), but he had to do what his Earth disguise was (and is) meant to be.

Sighing heavily, Barricade replied, "I'm on it." and he drove off to the designated address. He mumbled a stream of alien language swear words which ended with an indignant snarl.

He arrived at said robbed bank and contemplated. _Let's see…should I use the destructor ray or the outdated plasma shot gun? Plasma? Slag no. What am I, a burnout?_

Decision was made and Barricade made a holoform display beside the door of his police car mode. No one may seem to notice, but the holographic policeman was actually a graphic play of John Cusack with mustache. Barricade thought it was just plain amusing. John Cusack is a tall man and a mustache accentuated his authority look. Initially, he would like to use Samuel L. Jackson, but that can be used later.

The policeman held up a megaphone and shouted, "All right! You are now surrounded! Put your hands in the air and come out of the bank quietly!"

Barricade waited, yet the robber wouldn't come out no matter how many times he had repeated his commands. _This_ situation was and always will be despised by the Saleen S281. When he first played his role as a police car, he had no idea how persistent humans can be. Heck, he even thought that Decepticons weren't that persistent. For him, humans are stubborn and reckless.

Fed up of waiting, Barricade growled, unknowingly magnified it using his holographic human face who was still had a megaphone in his hands. The holographic policeman vanished into tiny bits of nanopixels. He shouted, despite being seen or not, "That's it! I have no choice but to use some force! You asked for it, wingnuts!"

From the roof of his vehicle form, a small missile was launched. It whooshed straight to the bank's lobby and…it stayed stationary.

"What the hell is that all about?" asked one of the robbers in the bank, staring at the still missile with confusion.

"I have no idea, man. I think it's some kind of a joke—"

The missile puffed and smoke engulfed the whole space available inside the bank. The robbers' eyes felt hot and sort of spicy. It felt like they put a hell lot of amount of Tabasco over their naked eyes. They screamed and scrambled out of the bank. They were then confronted by Barricade who flashed his headlights.

"Put your heads on the hood, bastards!" Barricade growled.

"Over here!" the leader of the robbers ran and his minions followed.

Barricade swore in his home language, and a very bad swearing that was, before he chased after the robbers. "You wanna play cat and mouse, eh? Fine! You asked for it, bit-brains!"

Barricade knew well the protocol of crooks like those. They usually ran through tight alleyways and deserted areas like dumpsters or abandoned factories. Barricade had it mapped perfectly in mind and his tenfold modern GPS trackers could follow those boys wherever they go and, hence, enabled him to calculate shorter and faster routes.

Inwardly, he smirked triumphantly. Those puny humans were nothing compared to him. He managed to block their way every time they got out of a small alleyway and compelled them to run to the landfill of the city. There, Barricade has something better in mind.

"Run, Forest, run!" Barricade tauntingly shouted at them as the young adult moneygrubbers pumped their leg muscles to the max while Barricade was running barely in quarter of his speed limit. He enjoyed this cat and mouse game and most of all, he enjoyed seeing their terrified and panicked faces.

One of the boys who ran on the back loaded his gun and shot multiple times at Barricade. One or two bullets effectively dented Barricade's hood. Barricade screeched and decelerated, but still running nonetheless. "Holy sweet mother fragger! My beautiful hood…" Barricade hissed as he examined his hood. "You're going to far now, fleshlings…"

Barricade pumped his gas and was now pursuing in one hundred miles per hour as the robbers jumped over a chicken wired fence. Barricade didn't stop; instead, his vehicle shape began to disassemble and much more complex mechanisms revealed themselves. Barricade took a giant leap and jumped over the chicken wire fence, over the culprits' heads and landed fully transformed in front of them.

"Holy shit! WHOA! WHOA! Jesus Christ!" the amateur criminals shrieked and swore frantically. Three of them stumbled backwards, lost for balance and lost for words as Barricade's eighteen-foot body loomed over them. The one in the middle was praying to his god, begging for mercy and sold eternal promises that he will never again took his grandmother's saving without her notice.

The others were about to run back, but Barricade shot projectiles at the ground a few meters in front of them and growled, "Freeze! Or else, I'll crush your pitiful stature suspender into dust!"

The culprits whimpered like dogs getting their asses whipped with horse lash. Well, they were about to get lashed with Barricade's spiked chain club. But Barricade decided not to do that; nevertheless, he was still going to teach those humans a valuable lesson.

Barricade took the big cloth bag of money and stored it in a compartment on his chest. He grinned horrendously at the gang of culprits (one of them peed in his pants) and barked at them tauntingly. The one who peed squealed shrilly—girl shrill. Then a low rumbling from Barricade's vocal processor emitted, resembling a human's diabolical growl.

Out of the blue, Barricade smashed his metallic hands onto the ground, making a small earthquake. "Do you think it's a good idea to go to the bank at this time of the day, huh?!" he snarled at them. "Do you have any idea how much trouble you caused? All those drags you caused _me_, especially?! I was having a good fragging sleep, fragging the fragging Autobots when _all of you_ made such a racket that the police station had to transmit some distress signal to my receiver! And you know that made my motherboard so hot I can't even process right! And when I can't process right…people die!!!" Barricade smashed the chain club to a vacant spot beside the gang.

"We—we're sorry, uh, Officer! We're just—we're just so desperate—it's…it's just a joke, see?" one of them defended.

But Barricade was not pleased.

"It is your half-processed joke that causes me so much trouble! I'm the only officer around that's still operating at this time of the day! And, oh by Primus, they don't even send back-ups!" Barricade's voice sounded more and more like a pride of lions that some of the boys swore they nearly fainted.

"Since I have no taste in crushing anything today, I just give you some dictate lesson. Follow after me," Barricade cleared his vocal processor, in result making a barking sound, "I hereby…"

"I hereby…"

"…shall never rob a bank anymore…"

"…shall never rob a bank anymore…"

"…or rob anything else in this puny, tiny, insufficient filthy planet…"

"…or rob anything else in this puny, tiny, insufficient filthy planet…"

"…and most importantly…"

"…and most importantly…"

"…I will leave Officer Barricade alone, enjoying his dreams of killing a particular yellow bot, and later help him to avoid club smashing to the aft by the high and mighty Lord Megatron."

"…I will leave Officer Barricade alone, enjoying his dreams of killing a particular yellow bot, and later help him to avoid club smashing to the aft by the high and mighty Lord Megatron."

"Huh, this is actually quite fun."

"Huh, this is actu—"

"Stop synchronizing me already!" Barricade roared at them. He looked around, his optics scanned for a sufficient tool to finish his job here. His red flashing optics brightened at the vision of a man-sized chain. He tied the young adults with it and welded the ends with a laser from his shoulder blades. He contemplated over his final work and a part on his face rose, resembling a human's smirk. His motto, after all, was "To punish and enslave…"

He stepped back and his size shrunk to his Saleen S281 vehicle mode. His rear door opened and using the seat belt, he yanked the boys in.

* * *

The local polices were perplexed yet grateful for the abandonment of young men tied securely with a welded chain right in front of the police office. Not only that, the bags the boys ran away with last night were placed on each boys' laps.

The commissioner shook one of them, "Who did this to you, young man? What's happening?"

"We…we robbed the bank last night."

"And then…?" the commissioner continued to inquire, curious of the vigilante's identity.

The young man shivered and sobbed, "You ain't gonna believe me. I think he's one of you, though."

"One of us?" the commissioner scratched his head. Tired of thinking, the commissioner told his men to lock the boys behind bars while his eyes gazed upon the city. If he just knew which 'one of them' the young man was talking about, he would have given him 'The Employee of the Month' star.

Far away from the police office, Barricade was enjoying the genesis of his day off. He found a neglected beach, just behind a car dumpster, sipping on the highest quality of fuel. Perching on a pick-up truck with his feet comfortably resting on broken and rusty VW Beetle, Barricade sighed, his hands behind his head. "Now this is what I call life!"

Purposely, he turned off the police radio. Who knew, the human world was and always be full of troubles and problems. Due to last night's activity, Barricade wanted a deep recharge and he didn't want the stupid police frequency to interfere again.

"_Barricade. Come in, Barricade."_

Ah, this voice. Barricade knew this voice and he disliked the speaker of this voice. "What is it, Starscream?" Barricade asked bitterly.

"_Where are you? We need you in Egypt, right away."_

Barricade's optics narrowed and he sighed. "Sorry, Screamer, I'm sitting this one out."

"_What?! You can't do that! Hey, sparkling, this is an—"_

_Click!_

Barricade inclined his neck joint, resting fully on the pick-up's roof. The flashing red light from his optics dimmed and his engines revved low.


End file.
